Email 19
The first attempt to comfort that most people offer is the word that Alex
is now with God. People are telling us that today, the first day we all are
together in Jacksonville.
They say Alex is “in a better place.”
It’s not that I don’t believe that, but that it is so irrelevant to me at the
moment. I want my boy, not God. I want to get to him. I can’t accept
any middle-man between myself and him, because I need to comfort
him, tell him it will be alright, hold him and say have no regrets about
this, move on with confidence Alex, wherever you are, with your chin
up, your sights straight ahead, and take it one day at a time, with your
spirits up.
But everyone else just wants to bring God into the equation, before you
are ready for God. Even as one who believes in God, I have no interest in
talking to him right now. I’m looking for Alex, not God.
So glad your sharing your posts with the world. Your work on grieving and loving is moving to me. It touches my heart in a profound way.